iPad kids can’t even play a hockey game without their phones falling out of their pockets

Fucking kids these days, man. They can’t go anywhere without their precious little screens. Constantly walks around with one AirPod in the ear. On their phone at dinner. On their phones in class. They can’t even show up to a hockey game anymore without having to have their phone on them.

We’ve seen this happen in baseball a time or two before. But honestly, it made sense. You have pockets in baseball pants and a place to easily store your mobile device. At least there’s an excuse to get thrown out there, that maybe you just forgot to take your phone out of your pocket before heading out to the game.

But there are no pockets in hockey pants. Maybe I just haven’t bought a new jock in over a decade, but I don’t think there are any pockets in there either. The only way to take your phone out during a hockey game is if you try to just keep it in your waistband. For the most part, anyone with a functioning brain would just leave the phone in the locker room. Almost anyone with a working brain would know that even if you took the phone with you to the bench, there is no way you can play a shift with it in your pants.

But for Nikita Dynyak, he could go the 45-60 seconds without his phone. Maybe he had a rocket in the stands he was trying to ride and he had to make sure he could answer a few texts. Maybe he fired off a few live bets on the Panthers/Falcons game. Maybe he was playing Candy Crush. Who knows. All I know is he better thank his lucky stars that John Tortorella isn’t coaching in the KHL or he’d be spending the next few seasons in the Gulag.

PS — Lover #21 trying to tell the ref that the phone must have come from the other bench. None of his teammates would be stupid enough to bring it onto the ice with him…

@JordieBarstool