Allison Holker says Stephen ‘Twitch’ boss changed after ‘Ayahuasca Journey’

Allison Holker Boss remembers the moment she says Stephen “Twitch” boss changed forever.

During an interview on Jamie Kern Lima Show While she promotes her memoir So far: my story of love, loss and embrace of lightHolker Boss revealed that her deceased husband began on an “Ayahuasca Journey” and “Wasn’t the same afterwards.”

“I think it was a very big turning point for him,” she said. “I feel like his heart was never really in the same place when he came back. Something was missing in his eyes. ”

“It just feels like he was opening something to himself that he never healed. And never got off completely, ”added Holker Boss, 36.

The professional dancer still said she was “really sad” about what her husband was going through, and despite it all, she would remember him as “a wonderful person.”

However, she also noticed that although she “always wants to” celebrate the boss, she couldn’t “celebrate so much of his (election)” – especially those who would leave a lasting impact on their children. (The two share a son Maddox, 9 next month, and daughter Zaia, 5, while Holker Boss also has a 16-year-old daughter Weslie from a previous relationship.)

“It’s a really nice line, I have to go as a mother right now … because (the kids) is very hurt by their father’s decision,” she said. “And they have a lot of triggers that they have to be in therapy now to really work through.”

“But what I’m impressed with is that they do the work and they spend time and they find joy in life and they find laughter again,” Holker Boss continued. “But there is a lot to unpack for them that they will have to tackle the rest of their lives.”

Last month So you think you can dance Judge opened up his decision to share her and Stephen’s story in her memoir – which also describes his fight ahead of his death by suicide in December 2022 at the age of 40 – after facing criticism from his dear and social media.

“To fans of Stephen and our family and friends I will be aware that my only intention of writing the book is to share my own story as well as part of my life with Stephen to help other people,” Holker Boss said at The time. “Like you, I never really knew what happened, and even when I try to put the pieces together, I never really want to know.”

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She continued partly, “I hope that by sharing our full story, I might help someone else who may see herself or a loved one in Stephen. When I share, I hope maybe they catch some (of) the red flags that I missed before it’s too late. ”

Holker Boss shared that over the past two years since his death she has “spoken in detail” with National Alliance of Mental HealthAt Solomon Family Solutions and The defensive line To “better educate myself into mental health problems so I can share warning signs with others.”

“My hope is that we don’t have to lose another man, brother, father or friend of suicide,” she continued. “I think if Stephen was able to choose, he would choose to have his story told if it meant to save another life.”

“A lot of love for all those who supported our family for these many years,” concluded Holker Boss.

If you or someone you know are considering suicide 988lifeline.org.